The Numpty of the Walk Award goes to (insert your own drumroll) Zara.
Why? Because she forgot to bring her walking boots. As we were parking the car, she turned to me with full teenage confidence and asked whether I had packed her boots. Err nope!
Thankfully, the Calverley Loop is a short, straightforward local wander, starting near the newsagents in Calverley, so her trainers survived the ordeal.
I found the route on the Hiiker app, and honestly, it was an excellent choice for a warm Sunday morning. The walk was mostly gentle bridleways, leafy woodland paths, and enough shade to stop us melting. It was incredibly peaceful hearing the birds twittering and we did have a laugh about how quiet it was without Rachel shouting at Hagrid.
We broke up the heat near the end of the walk with some water‑pistol action, courtesy of my trip to B&M the previous day.
Nobody fell over, which is a miracle in itself, although I came very close. A dramatic stumble, a flailing recovery that I felt made me look like a gymnast, and the kind of laughter from Louise and Zara that suggests they would absolutely have filmed it if they could have.
On a random note, I feel that a numpty of the walk award should be awarded on every walk. Unfortunately the walking group does not agree with this, as it’s only ever me doing the awarding.
A 5 mile stroll which takes 2 hours. I really recommend it.
Breathless Hikers 
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